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Do you feel guilty for saying "no"?
And why it's important your prioritise yourself too.
I've been having a lot of conversations on the topic of "guilt" lately.
And it's surprising how many contexts and situations this guilty feeling extends to as well.
Someone feeling guilty because they have a friend who's going through a hard time, all while they themselves are going through a hard time as well.
They find it hard to say no.
Another person battling over whether they want to fulfill their dreams of working overseas, but have parents that aren't supportive of this decision too.
So they stay on, albeit unhappy.
And yet another feeling resentment from being at their job, because they have a toxic colleague who's a bully.
And being guilt tripped into thinking they are not being a good "team mate", they take on way more than they are supposed to do.
--
Relationships are difficult things.
If possible, we want everyone around us to be happy and to be at peace.
But a lot of times, that's just not possible, nor is it our responsibility to make everyone around us happy either.
To sacrifice yourself just to keep the peace?
And then live with chaos inside you?
That's not kindness, that's misery.
--
It's not selfish to say no.
It's not selfish to prioritise your needs either.
Needs are not meant to be sacrificed, they are meant to be talked about and negotiated too.
This process is exactly what turns unhealthy relationships into healthier ones as well.
And if the other person won't budge or doesn't want to hear it?
Well, you've done your part haven't you?
Go on then, prioritise yourself all while knowing you tried your best too :)
Take care,
Hernping
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