A tale of an "inner critic".

The part of you carrying the burden of being better.

For those of you struggling with a harsh inner critic, maybe you know this feeling too.

That voice inside your head that always seems to find another flaw.

Another mistake.

Another reason to feel ashamed.

The voice that says:

“Don’t embarrass yourself.”

“You should’ve done better.”

“Don’t be too much.”

And after a while, it can really start to feel like your own mind has turned against you.

But I hope this post is making you wonder…

Why does this part even exist in the first place?

Because if our minds are meant to help us survive, what purpose would self-hatred even serve?

Why would a part of us spend so much time criticising us, pressuring us, pushing us, making us feel small?

I don’t think most inner critics begin from cruelty.

Maybe somewhere along the way, this part of us simply learned that mistakes were dangerous.

That rejection hurt. That criticism hurt. That being “not good enough” came with consequences.

So maybe it started watching us carefully.

Trying to correct us before someone else could.

Trying to push us harder so we would not fail, be rejected, or be abandoned.

Not because it actually hated us.

But because somewhere deep down, it became afraid for us.

I know this probably won't change things completely.

But maybe it changes something small.

Maybe instead of only seeing this part as an enemy, we begin noticing that it might also be tired.

Tired from carrying fear for such a long time.

And maybe healing is not learning how to hate this part less violently.

Maybe it’s slowly helping it realise that we no longer need fear and shame just to deserve love or belonging.

And maybe it’s a wonderful start to pause for a moment and gently notice:

“Something inside me is hurting again.”

And maybe that moment of noticing— without shame, without punishment— is already the beginning of something different.

You got this,

Hernping

💙

For my client's inner critic she calls "Elmo".

Thank you for trying so hard to protect mama.

I hope you like your new job now.

Care.

And love.

#letskeepgoing #innercritic

#traumahealing

#partswork

#internalfamilysystems