Boundaries is loving you, is loving me.
How to really show we care.
Far too often, we think of being loving as giving ourselves up for the other person.
It is a way of showing that we care, and just how much they mean to us.
And how much we are willing to sacrifice to show them that they are loved.
But in giving so much, it can make us feel exhausted too.
Perhaps beyond exhaustion, other feelings build up inside of us as well.
A quiet resentment from time to time.
Bottled-up frustration even too.
And when it gets too much, we project unintentional blame unto the other.
Causing hurt that we never, ever meant to do.
Love, without first loving ourselves, is unsustainable.
For a relationship of giving and giving but not having our needs met may be valiant, but futile.
Any relationship, whether friendships, romantic, or platonic, must have boundaries.
While the other person's NEEDS from you are important, so OUR OWN.
This is an important conversation for all relationships - the healthy expression of boundaries.
And as such, the healthy expression of our own needs as well.
Whether that's having your own space to recuperate, or your feelings heard, or the stability of knowing that whatever you share (healthily), they will be here no matter what.
And at the root of it, the emotional safety in you being able to share your needs too.
Having such boundaries makes our expression of love more genuine, powerful and lasting.
So remember to first love yourself okay? For loving yourself must come first in order for you to give TRUE love to another.
(Original quote by Prentis Hemphil
"Boundaries are the distance in which I can love you and me simultaneously)
I just really prefer the word "time".