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9 research-backed tips to bring back excitement into your relationships.

Updated: May 27, 2021

Been together for a while and need some ideas to reignite the fire? And no, it doesn't include a pretend ha-douken.


My wife and I just celebrated our two year wedding anniversary.


Congrats to us! I took her out for a teppanyaki lunch at Shima, and in the evening we headed to the River Safari to adore the Giant Pandas and Manatees. The little Red Pandas were so darn bloody cute. Watching them chitter about snacking on leaves made my hardened old heart melt just a little.


Celebration day asides, in a short span of two years, we've seen many days where we would fall into routine. She would go do her favourite thing in the world (watch television), while I would be out playing basketball and the like. Still, we try our best to do many exciting things together and keep the spark of being a relatively newly wedded couple glowing.


While thinking about this article, I can't imagine what our marriage would look like twenty or thirty years down the road. Would we fall into the trap of staleness and boredom with each other? Will we run out of new and exciting things to do together?



Are your relationships getting stale?


The beauty of a new relationship. It's so novel and exciting to get to know a completely new human being. There is so much to learn about the other person - what does he or she like to do, what kind of music do they listen to, what books to they read, what kind of activities gives them the thrill.


After some time though, the novelty of a relationship will inevitably wear off. It might seem like there's not much else to know about the other person, or maybe curiousity about each other has even tapered off.


It's expected of all things good in life - our brains adapt to pleasant and novel things. The things that make us excited in the past now make us feel bored and unfulfilled. The same thing would happen if my wife and I started going to the River Safari every weekend. Even the Red Pandas might become a little meh.